Fiona:  hi
Josef:  hi
   welcome... to chatting
Fiona:  i’m nervous
   are you nervous?
Josef:  definitely
Fiona:  oh wonderful
   where are you right now?
Josef:  in my apartment
   you?
Fiona:  in my bed
   face away from the door and windows
Josef:  oh good. that sounds safe.
Fiona:  yes. under the covers & everything
   if i’m in my safest place i feel i’ll be less    
   performative.
Josef:  yea, i feel like we have to keep the    
   performativity to a minimum
   cold and calculating should be the way of 
   our chat
Fiona:  ha. i have never been cold or 
   calculating, well, except in that one    
   circumstance but that’s because i was    
   hot and bothered.
   i am feeling sudden empathy for all my    
   interview subjects
Josef:  well this is kind of a funny situation    
   because it feels like an interview, but an    
   interview in which neither role is clear    
   and we know nothing about each other
   we’re in a zero-g social space right now
Fiona:  i dig some digging into who you    
   are. (also -- cold & calculating is totally    
   performative)
   did* some
Josef:  shit
   well played
   well chatted i should say
Fiona:  always research
   always
   should we have a safe word?
Josef:  we should definitely have a safe    
   word
   we should have a few
   a whole safe word cloud
Fiona:  no i’ll never remember more than    
   one
Josef:  ok “one” it is then
Fiona:  do you have any ideas?
Josef:  for chatting?
Fiona:  no for the safe word
Josef:  oh i thought it was “one”
Fiona:  fuck no
Josef:  shit
   ONE
   ONE
Fiona:  NO
   NO
Josef:  ok what if “no” is the safe word
Fiona:  NO
   i’m going to use it too much
   have you never used a safe word?
   it has to be something you wouldn’t    
   otherwise say
Josef:  ok
   what’s the word you use least
Fiona:  i wouldn’t know it
Josef:  ok what’s the word you want to use    
   least
Fiona:  lady
Josef:  let’s go with lady
Fiona:  lady it is
Josef:  why is lady the word you want to 
    use least (i was not using it in the safe 
    word sense there)
Fiona:  “hey ladies”
    “luck be a lady”
    “my fair lady”
    idk
    i don’t like it... lately. i may change my 
    mind. that often happens.
Josef:  let me know if you change your     
    mind, so we can figure out a new safe 
    word if necessary
Fiona:  oh well i mean over several years 
    time. i’m fickle but i’m not that fickle
    is there a word you’d be glad never to 
    hear again?
Josef:  one
Fiona:  :)
Josef:  :)
   how do you know the claudius app 
   people?
Fiona:  i met jeff and eric through my friend 
   snp. for awhile i only ever saw them in 
   my apt when i’d have house parties. then 
   that was followed up on twitter then 
   some e-mails...
   i very recently started sleeping with eric.
   lol which i trust he’ll edit out if he wants
Josef:  what’s eric’s safe word?
Fiona:  ha. i don’t know yet.
   what do you think it would be?
Josef:  i don’t know... maybe “eric”?
   but in a funny voice
   the voice signals that it’s being used in a 
   safety word way
Fiona:  how very “I”
   i guess him saying his own name would 
   be unusual
Josef:  is that an upper case “i” or a lower 
   case “L”
Fiona:  upper i
Josef:  ah
   yea, he could say his own name, but in 
   this really campy robotic way
   like how a cartoon robot would say it
   a distressed cartoon robot
Fiona:  you’re really getting into this
   god the last time i chatted with a  boy i’d 
   never met but understood as not a 
   stranger was grade 8
   ottawa, ontario
Josef:  was it much different?
   the chat i mean
Fiona:  yes and no. it was filthier. but also 
   -- it’s one of those memories that feel so    
   close. like when it happened i knew i’d be 
   remembering it from march 2014, at 26, 
   from another country
   do you have those?
Josef:  moments when i can see the 
   future? or filthy chats
Fiona:  when you can see the future
   or when linear time collapses
Josef:  i don’t think i’ve ever had that 
   happen, unfortunately
   i’m time’s prisoner
   i go where time goes
Fiona:  that’s shitty. i recommend weed, 
   meditation, and the female orgasm
Josef:  where can i purchase this female 
   orgasm of which you speak
   ...i need it for a friend
   my friend time
Fiona:  you could start taking estrogen & 
   what not. i’ve heard it will change your 
   orgasm, as you transition M2F
Josef:  that’s good advice, thank you
   wait, so you think eric is going to edit this 
   once we turn it in to him?
Fiona:  i don’t know. i don’t think we 
   should talk about he or jeff too much 
   though. i’ve heard a lot of other partners 
   did that.
Josef:  ok. let’s use pseudonyms
   do you think howard is going to edit this    
   once we turn it in to him?
Fiona:  i really have no idea. i’m curious 
   also if they will keep the ‘me’s in there
   or if they’ll edit it to read Josef-Fiona-
   Josef-Fiona
   I like the idea of two facing streams w/ 
   the me’s inversed
Josef:  they should edit it to read “Me-Me-
   Me-Me”
Fiona:  haha
   absolutely
Josef:  so did you talk to other chat 
   partners? what else did people talk about 
   other than howard
   and geff
Fiona:  well i heard malcolm harris was not 
   pleased with the way his turned out & 
   requested they not publish it
Josef:  do you know why he wasn’t 
   pleased?
Fiona:  nope. but it’s mal
   (i love you)
   i heard dayna & jenny’s was amazing
Josef:  i don’t know who those people are
   what did they chat about?
Fiona:  j’ai aucune idée
Josef:  damn
Fiona:  why?
Josef:  we could’ve maybe copied some of 
   it
   gotten some of that shine
   not to say that our chat isn’t good
Fiona:  we can’t mimic their shine
   it’s all about what happens between us
   our particular circumstance
   what were you doing right before we 
   started chatting?
Josef:  memorizing everything i was going 
   to chat
Fiona:  oh then you should repeat it now
Josef:  i have been
   (including that)
Fiona:  how self-aware
Josef:  very lower case L
Fiona:  mmm
   our theme
   was
   tacit
   i liked that
Josef:  i feel like we’ve stuck to that theme 
   pretty well
Fiona:  what’s been implied in our 
   conversation so far?
Josef:  oh you know
Fiona:  cute
Fiona:  i’m often frustrated by the implicit
   not the unconscious implicit... but when 
   people assume taticness as a tactic
   it’s a power grab
   tacitness*
   tic tic
   toc
Josef:  do you have an example?
Fiona:  sure, the strong silent type. the 
   cowboy dick. or jeff koons’ smirk
   sarcasm kind of is that too
   repeating back what another person’s 
   said, creating this echo chamber, that’s 
   an absence
Josef:  it’s definitely rude to repeat back 
   what someone has just said to you
   have you met jeff koons?
Fiona:  i haven’t no.
Josef:  me neither
Fiona:  There’d been so many Dicks in my life prior to [my husband] Sylvere [Lotringer], mean horse-faced junkie cowboys.

GI: Mean horse-faced junkie cowboys?

CK: Yeah. The mystique of simplicity and silence. And this had really fucked me up, just like a lot of other women, so I figured if I’m going to do it now, I’d better study it. Revisit it at the Third Remove. It was very Kierkegaard.
Josef:  that’s great
Fiona:  yes
   it is
   are you ever frustrated by the implicit?
Josef:  it kind of depends, i think. depends 
   on what the framing is.
Fiona:  well everything depends
Josef:  ok that was frustrating
   kidding
Josef:  i think that’s the trouble with 
   conversations like this - they have a topic    
   but it’s very general, so everything 
   depends
   it’s hard to move past abstractions
Fiona:  then make it specific
   you can do anything you want
Josef:  i didn’t mean that as a critique in 
   any serious way
Fiona:  no no i know or i think i did
   i was being serious
   do you know you can do anything? i feel 
   like a lot of people odn’t know that
Josef:  if there’s one thing i know, it is that    
   i definitely cannot do anything
Fiona:  what can’t you do? beyond live    
   forever or bring back the dead or time    
   travel or
Josef:  or apparently go 10 minutes 
   without using “definitely” in a sentence
Fiona:  i like the affirmative definitely
   it’s kind
   and definite
   oh but i see you just used it up there 
   differently
   definitely
   the agreement definitely is great tho
Josef:  yea i like that too
   i like emphatic agreements
   “definitely” “totally”
   “absolutely”
   “indubitably”
   “irrevocably”
Fiona:  unquestionably
   i like no doubt
Josef:  no doubt is a good one
Fiona:  and genau
   and yeah baby
   ha
Josef:  for sure
Josef:  what are some implied agreements
Fiona:  lov
   e
   after a time
Josef:  i was thinking more like expressions
Fiona:  i need an example
Josef:  i don’t know one off-hand
   let me think
Josef:  i guess it’d have to be something    
   like, you move forward in the    
   conversation without agreeing with its 
   premise, but in a way that assumes that    
   premise is agreed-upon
   so if you said, “let’s go to the lake”; and i 
   said, “we should go kayaking”
Fiona:  oh i like that
   “would you like to have dinner?” “pick 
   me up at 8”
   it’s sexy
Josef:  it’s a good way to agree
Josef:  on that note! i have to take off
Fiona:  perfect
Josef:  thank you for the chat!
Fiona:  i enjoyed it
Josef:  me too
Fiona:  shall you send or i?
Josef:  let’s both, so they have a choice of 
   “me”
Fiona:  me!
Josef:  me!
Fiona:  gorgeous
   bonne nuit Josef
Josef:  goodnight